the pattyo

Couldn’t you put the show on a bit earlier? It always makes me very hungry, and I shouldn’t eat that late at night.
I’m sure you understand.
Thank you.

I’m sure the drugs they found were merely from the show. Really. Because I like the guy. And if I like someone … well …
Oh never mind.
I like the guy he’s playing on the show. Guess that doesn’t mean anything about the actor, eh?
But what a stash.

Maybe this isn’t funny to anyone else. I landed here because of the word “opera” … it’s an “opera gown” for a toddler.
Um. Say what?
Maybe it’s a costume? But the beginning of the description was just too funny:

A gown that will embrace the natural form of any princess, while keeping in-step with the [...]

To the Friends and Family of Ms. Kelsey Mitchell and Mr. Mel Layos,
I am inviting you to use my 20% off Friends and Family Pass from May 1-4.
Kelsey and Mel love the Waterford Lisette China they selected together and
they still need everything from their 5 Piece Place settings to their
serving and accessory pieces. Please [...]

Dan directed my attention to a video of Annie Liebowitz taking pictures of the Queen of England. Fun to watch.
But I’m convinced Liebowitz couldn’t get a decent picture of yours truly. No one can. Pictures and I don’t get along. Go figure.
Of course I have to be in pictures for The Wedding. Yikes!

I know folks up here don’t live near Bloomingdale’s, but perhaps orders can even be placed online. I’ll ask the woman who sent me this:
Hello Mrs. Mitchell,
Kelsey and Mel’s wedding is just around the corner and I wanted to see if I may be of any assistance to you or any of their wedding [...]

Mel & Kelsey sent out their invitations, and yesterday we received our first two response cards. (Both were attending!)
In addition, I continue to check out their photographer’s blog (Katy Regnier). She’s fabulous, and I can’t wait to see pictures of Kelsey and Mel. (Of course I wonder if she can possibly make me look decent [...]

The house is a mess. The yard? Forget about it.
I’ve been busy, but not so busy things should be this way. I’m just darn lazy. And maybe if I admit it here I’ll finally get my act together and figure out how to get the house clean and get the yard cleaned up. (I [...]

When I call to ask a simple question, knowing I made a mistake and will owe you more money, and then get put on hold, must I really be forced to listen to Waltz of the Flowers from Nutcracker?
Really now. Insult to injury and all that jazz.